Loosies – Love and Hope
Does love help us to find hope?
This is a story about love. For anyone who loves a good romance against the odds, this is one to watch. Although it has been rated only with a 19% score in Rotten Tomatoes, I really enjoyed this film. If you can get past the borderline cheesy storyline which is all wrapped up fairly neatly by the end, it is a story about hope and love. A young man called Bobby (Peter Facinelli) is forced into pickpocketing to pay off his father’s gambling debts. One day, a young woman approaches him to tell him she is pregnant with his baby. He had a one night stand with her 3 months earlier. The story is then about the emotional struggle and choice he needs to make between a life of love and honesty or his continued life as a thief.
I believe that love can make a huge difference to the choices we make and we influence others to make. Bobby has lost hope to some extent in his life. He is existing rather than living and going through the daily motions, where he feels little sense of control. When he meets Lucy he connects with her so strongly but is too scared to continue the relationship for fear of loss or rejection. The replaying of the night he met Lucy was magical and for me, depicts the essence of romantic love, when we meet someone where we truly connect, spiritually, emotionally and physically and how wonderful that can feel at first. And yet how frightening the intensity of those feelings can be as often hope brings with it fear and doubt.
When Bobby finally does decide to embrace vulnerability and accept love, he is able to make the choices he has always wanted to make and his life and family’s fortune spiral upwards. Snyder (2002) in his article on hope called “Rainbows in the Mind” describes hope as being goal oriented. We need to have sufficient motivation and pathways to reach our desired goal. So we have to be motivated enough to want to achieve the goal and we have to be creative enough to find the right way to reach our goal. The expression “where there’s a will, there’s a way” springs to mind. Reading the hope literature I felt that there was something missing. Something about the fear, doubt and vulnerability which can accompany hope and how sometimes hope can feel like something we do not control. I often feel when I hope that I may get disappointed – I suppose the expression “don’t get your hopes up” reflects this feeling. Bobby felt that if he opened himself up to hoping for a love full of the intense feelings from that first night with Lucy, then he may get disappointed or experience loss.
For me this film shows that love can give us the motivation to reach our goal, and once we have motivation, we then become more creative about the way we can reach our goal. In this film Bobby has to overcome the significant challenges trying to change his life when there is a police team wanting to send him to prison as well as local rogues who do not have his best interests at heart. Love helps him to find creative ways and the courage to want to do this and to find the better life he has been missing without realizing it. Often when we are languishing in a rut we don’t realise we are missing a much more wonderful life. Love in my view can show us the way to this life.
So for me, love is a catalyst and driver for hope. It is something that can give us the motivation to reach our goals and dreams. Yes, we need to have love for ourselves, but others sometimes see things in us that we cannot see in ourselves and this can sometimes be enough to kickstart a glimmer of hope.
I think we can all show love in some ways and it does not need to be a romantic love necessarily – It can be friendship, a family member or even a chance meeting can be full of love and connection and who knows, could start kick start a glimmer of hope for someone.