The hardest lesson learned on one’s own. The most important lesson we can teach our children. The most profound act of kindness and love for humanity to accept without remorse.

Iain S. Thomas said, “I said never apologize for how you feel. No one can control how they feel. The sun doesn’t apologize for being the sun. The rain doesn’t say sorry for falling. Feelings just are.”

But that doesn’t mean we can’t work toward knowing when a shift in consciousness shouldn’t be considered.

To apologize means we trust in the universe enough to let it show us what we need to learn. Trust vs. Mistrust is a milestone. One that I believe lasts throughout a lifetime. Not only in one of the stages of life. When we are betrayed so badly that we become broken versions of ourselves, we also bury our ability to trust. To heal is to let that seed of trust grow into the sunlight again. To allow that darkness to sleep so that we may live as a whole person.

When we lead with love as a strength, we teach our children to trust us, to trust others, to trust themselves.

To remain unapologetic though. That is where our identity flourishes. When we are free to be who we are, as is (and as long as we are ethically sound in not harming others in our wake), we are in flow with the universe. This is a synthesis of several concepts in the field of psychology, but that is part of what we do, part of who we are… part of how we learn why we study psychology in the first place. To put all the pieces of our human puzzle together so that others can see the big picture of what we do. Our purpose in the field is to scrutinize, test, measure, re-test, evaluate, question, accept or reject theories.

The receivers of this information are the public at large. They can’t possibly be asked to get where we come up with any of this. So? We create a safe place for them to receive our work in their own terms, language, and thoughts.

I do not apologize for being me. It took me half a century to reach this destination. The view from here is breathtaking. It took many developmental milestones, several complex pillars; and one fat pyramid-hierarchy of decision making I have to take ownership of, to reach that place of no longer feeling the need to apologize for being who I am.

When we no longer feel compelled to apologize for who we are (internally or externally), our view of our life’s path is clear.

When we free ourselves of worrying what others think or fearfully remain obedient to the norms of society, culture or community, we stay stagnant in our own reality.

When we step away from the group[think], formulate our own opinions and find the voice to disagree without malice, we clear our own path of flourishing.

 

About the author: Karen Henry-Daly is a transitions life coach, writer and speaker. She specializes in working with people who want to create positive changes and savor who they want to be. Her full bio can be found at:  wings13326.wix.com/wings13326#!about-karen-e-m-henry-ma/c11k

 

‘We Are The Positive Psychology People’

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