Confidence is a universal value. Is it more important than happiness? Can one be happy without self-confidence? It’s a trait that solves the most basic of human struggle. When we own who we are, we become free to thrive, to love and, to live as we optimally can.

I live in a culture where if one is not bold, we can fall through the cracks. Then again, if we are not complacent enough to ebb and flow with the trends, the common ground or the ‘group’, we can also get lost in the crowd. I can’t speak for your cultural social etiquette, but mine is tricky.

Confidence grows on you.

As a female growing up in the Northeastern part of the United States, I am more assertive than many of my female friends from around the world. I am also rather put off by overly assertive individuals. There is a balance.

There is a fine line between being confident and being brazen in one’s presentation of self.

I enjoy bold, confident people. However, I am in awe of those who have a personality so charismatic they can own the room. Motivational speaking is an art form. Not all presenters have it. There is a nuance to truly inspiring people, which, unless understood, it’s simply overlooked. One must fully believe in their message. There’s also a fine line between confidence and arrogance.

Some people are so overly confident, they don’t seem to notice that they are unpleasant. They bowl people over with dominance, rather than inspire them with the gift of attentiveness. Some people are inauthentic in their cheerful disposition. Inauthenticity owns no confidence.

The Art of Being

So how does one shine in their confidence without dominating in their arrogance? A truly confident person has no need to ‘prove’ themselves.

  • They are fully aware of their knowledge, skill, ability, or themselves.
  • They are never afraid to make a mistake.
  • They are always delighted to experience a success, but don’t insist that others celebrate them.
  • They surround themselves with others who will celebrate with them because of sincerity.
  • It’s okay if someone doesn’t approve of or like them because they are okay with the knowledge that not everyone will.

A fully confident person will also understand that to be humble, without humble-bragging is crucial to one’s journey.

It’s taken me a majority of my lifetime to fully experience confidence to the point of owning my truth, living in my ‘now’ and celebrating the accomplishments of others as part of my own collective experience.

When we love who we are, we are never afraid to be absolutely incandescently in love with our own life. We stay focused on making the world around us a bit better, but expect nothing in return.

To me. That is confidence. That is love.



About the Author: Karen Henry [Daly], MA CRM owns Henry Healing as a holistic well-being practitioner and writer. She’s a former university professor and current scholar practicing the infusion of positive, existential and community psychology. Wednesday is my Tuesday.



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