by Monique Zahavi | March, 2021 | confidence, Monique Zahavi
We humans are all narrators of our own life stories. We are meaning-making creatures, even those of us with no religious beliefs. Our lived experiences shape the way we see ourselves and influence the creation of our internal ‘screenplay’. McAdams (2001) life story research discussed multiple psychological theories related to culture, societal influence, gender, life stage and many other factors, which determine our internal dialogue and the way we see the world. How we think it will be and how it is Most of us are incredibly good at painting colourful pictures in our minds, of how we think life will be, and often, we do the same with how it has been, putting our past episodes, good or bad, in an ‘experience box’ from which we can construct our life stories. We really are all far more creative than we might think, even those of us who don’t relate to being creative in any way. Most of us expertly adjust our narratives to explain the less exciting or desirable parts of life, so that with all the confusion and chaos we find along our journeys, we can make sense of, and perceive a sense of control over our destinies. Yet one of the certainties of life, is that there is no certainty, which is particularly poignant now, when Covid-19 has impacted all of us. Many people feel a loss of control over our lives, dreams, and freedoms, in a way they never have before. The changes in the way we live, for many of us, are a mismatch for the stories we have made up about our lives...
by Pinky Jangra | December, 2019 | confidence, Pinky Jangra
I know I’m very, very, good at what I do. I have been studying human development for 13 years, I have been blessed with a keen sense of awareness and when I’m tuned in, I can spot truth in situations and people pretty fast which allows me to get to the root of problems. I am a great speaker and teacher – put me in front of a group of people and as much as I will get nervous, I’ll also smash it out of the park. Because, that’s what I love doing. And I’m great at it. Also, I now feel so incredibly awkward and uncomfortable after writing all that! You see, I was taught that boasting was bad. It doesn’t feel good to me to blow my own trumpet. And the truth is that I don’t always feel that sure of myself. I infrequently speak about my accomplishments or share my successes unless I have to, like when I’m writing a C.V. or, if someone explicitly asks me about something I achieved or, if it naturally fits into a conversation. I don’t post on social media every week about how my work has helped people or, the wonderful testimonials and messages I received about it. Although I do have big goals, I don’t proclaim myself as being a ‘world changer’ who ‘wants to affect the lives of a million people’ and I only share my goals with a select few. Yet, I see other people proclaiming their greatness online and in person every single day. They full-on go for it and often, it seems to work. People who...
