When we face adversity, I find I get to know myself better. This is because it shines the light onto the areas that cement me in my fears. However, I find these challenging times, which storms my world from peace, is enough on its own, without the well of despair from pastures long ago to add to the turmoil.
You see, during these times, we not only deal with the presenting difficulty, we also deal with the emotional turmoil and beliefs which kindly laid doormat when things feel better. The positivity doesn’t seem to give them air to breathe. However when fear sets in, they come out to play. They create a momentum of chaos, a heaviness which fogs over our clarity. It acts as an internal battle, which has no place for you to escape if you sit with them too long.
For some it is a temporary phase and the light and calm waters do eventually come in. As I sit writing this, I wonder what it would be like to instead of having a negative bias, what would it be like if in these times of woe, instead of accompanying it with more stress, worry, concern, despair. What would it feel like to naturally link it with compassion more easily? As this does not come naturally to me. Then I think, as a teacher this shift in mind-set, which does not happen overnight would aid so many of my students in so many ways.
Positive changes in teaching
So, for me the curriculum needs to add more room for wellbeing, mindfulness practice, self-compassion to raise standards in self-esteem and confidence. Gratitude for all the things you do have well and all the things you have achieved while you focus on the path of where you need to be. A focus on celebrating your strengths and encouraging to be your authentic self. I am learning this stuff in my late 30s and so wish some of the knowledge I now have on my pursuit to living a meaningful and purposeful life came earlier. This would have meant spending less time stressing about that in the face of only having one life to live, really doesn’t. If only there was more emphasis and time spent on getting to know myself, as the only world we really do focus on is external, which when facing adversity is not enough. I know some of these aspects are introduced to school, but I don’t mean as an intervention, I mean embedded as a way of school life.
So, what would the children of the world be like if we did teach more of these skills in schools? What if we taught them about belief patterns and that they can change them? What if we gave more room to experience more positive emotions? I know one thing that would change – the bullying figures would decrease because the energy of authentic happiness wouldn’t offer the environment energy for bullying to exist. Bullying lives in the energy of fear. How transformational would this be in sustaining a positive self-image, a strong sense of self-worth and most importantly a deep connection to self-love!
Instead of walking with I am not good enough echoing around them because they haven’t met all the expectations put upon them from an education system which lacks balance of academic performance and character development. These children could radiate self-worth, as they have not only been taught important skills in passing exams and assessments, but also the important life skills they need to live well and treat others with kindness.
About the author: Kelly Seaward became a teacher in 2003, graduating from The Central School of Speech and Drama. She is also a Hypnotherapist, Counsellor and Psychotherapist. Currently she is a MAPP student at New Bucks University. Her passion is helping people to live positive, more joyful lives through changing their mind-sets. www.silentblessing.co.uk